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November 1-7, 1996

The Other Side of Fame

HOLLYWOOD CALLING: After a series of big breaks, Lauren Tom is coming to terms with being an Asian American actor in Hollywood. "The last thing I want," says Tom, "is to end up a bitter Asian American actor, sitting with a bunch of other bitter Asian American actors, complaining about how horrible it is."

One of Asian America's leading actresses brought her latest performance piece to the Bay Area last month as part of San Francisco's Solo Mio Festival. A one-woman show, Lauren Tom's 25 Psychics is an autobiographical story that touches on her lonely childhood in a middle-class suburb; the advice of her no-nonsense grandmother; and an amusing gallery of gurus, tarot-card readers, jerk boyfriends, Zen monks, and yogis she met during her search for self-realization.

Despite mixed reviews by local critics, Tom remains undeterred. "I want to expand it," she said. "Originally, it was commissioned by HBO. When they saw it, they wanted me to keep it very light and not go too deeply into anything painful because it was for the U.S. Comedy Arts Festival. But now, from the feedback I've heard during the Q-and-A sessions after the show, I think people want to hear more about my experiences as the only Asian in Highland Park, Illinois."

Regarding the complaint made by some critics that the solo piece is unresolved, Tom responded, "I don't have any answers. I'm still seeking. That's why the show is somewhat open-ended."

Most successful actors have tales of waiting tables and driving cabs while working toward their big break. For Lauren Tom, her rise to fame was a little different. Perhaps best known for her roles in The Joy Luck Club and the popular sitcom Friends, Tom's opportunity came when the musical A Chorus Line passed through Chicago. At that point, she was a freshman in college who was spending most of her free time in dance class. "My friends at the dance studio encouraged me to audition for the show because there was a role in it for an Asian girl."

Much to her surprise, Tom landed the part. She had no problem with the physical demands of the role. "But as far as talking went, I was really shy," she said. "I could dance the hell out of the stuff-that was no problem. But, as far as talking and singing, I was terrified. They told me later they were worried they might have to fire me after the first two weeks because it was so bad. But they worked with me, gave me singing lessons and acting coaching, and I started to blossom after that."

As Tom was hitting her stride and finding her voice, she was struck by personal tragedy. It was something that still haunts her to this day. "My father was going to drive my brother to Stanford and then fly to New York to see me open on Broadway and he had a heart attack before he got into the car," she recalled.

Tom immediately flew back to Chicago for the funeral. Fortunately, her role in A Chorus Line was being held for her while she was away. After taking care of family affairs, she returned to New York and ended up doing the show on Broadway for about a year and a half. Sound advice made her career take another turn.

"Friends in A Chorus Line told me I should study acting because being a dancer is like being an athlete," Tom said. "[With dancing], I'd be done by the time I was 30. It was then that I realized I really like acting more than dancing because it's so much easier on your body. But I still like to dance," she said with a smile.

When Tom started acting professionally, she didn't consider herself any different than other actors. "I never started to deal with the issue of my ethnicity until later. I think I wanted to assimilate so much," she said. "I wanted to belong so much that I really saw myself as a white girl. Somewhere deep down, I didn't connect to my Asianness at all. The bad news was that I was really disconnected with myself. The good news was that early on in my career I had no idea how hard it was for an Asian to be in show business. I started to book jobs that had nothing to do with my being Asian."

Time has taken some of the edge off of her youthful optimism. "I wish I still had that same kind of open na•vetˇ, but now that I've been in Hollywood for a while, I have experienced some of the discrimination that people ask me about. They ask, 'Isn't it tough to be an Asian American actress in Hollywood?' And you know what? It is, but I like to stay focused on the positive."

Tom's own approach to the notorious lack of good roles for Asian Americans is practical and upbeat. "The most important thing for me is to work. You need to get experience, to get to a position where you have some kind of power. The last thing I want is to end up a bitter Asian American actor, sitting with a bunch of other bitter Asian American actors, complaining about how horrible it is."

While Tom acknowledges the highly competitive nature of Hollywood and the mainstream media, she also recognizes, "It's changing slowly. There are a lot more Asian actors on TV now. But it's going to be a process. The thing is to educate the people who are behind the creative team-the writer, the director. And for Asian American actors not to automatically turn something down because the character has an accent."

As she reveals in 25 Psychics, a large part of her life has been a quest for spirituality. "I want to feel like my life has meaning. I believe that we all have a mission on this planet, and it basically boils down to service. In order to keep myself in alignment with that, I feel like I need to stay dedicated to some kind of spiritual path because there are so many things to pull you off of that, especially in Hollywood where what's valued is how you look, how young you are, how much money you make, what kind of car you drive, what kind of house you have. You can really get sucked into a downward spiral. That's not where the happiness lies."

As she continues the process of maturing as an artist, Tom feels a greater affinity and connection to the Asian community. "I feel a responsibility to keep our integrity intact in the eyes of the media and in the eyes of the public. If I can touch someone, make them laugh, help them reflect on something in their own life that they may not have, that's of value."

Lauren Tom plans to take 25 Psychics on a nationwide tour in 1997. In the meantime, she can be seen in the upcoming movies Murder Live on NBC and Tell Me No Secrets on ABC.