Blast from the Past: After centuries of racism, we're still not laughing. Voices from the Community: Amy Leang's racist experience at ASNE. Emil Amok: The Puckheads Think They're Funny. Lead Editorial: Heh, heh, heh.
	Elaine Chao Visits the Valley (in National News) Beware Rogue Immigration Consultants! (in Bay Area News) Aftermath of the Spy Plane Standoff (in Business) San Francisco International Film Fest (in A&E) Emil Amok: The Puckheads Think They're Funny (in Opinion)

The Puckheads Think They’re Funny

By Emil Guillermo

It’s Stanley Cup time, and since Asian Americans of Filipino descent often confuse “f’s” with “p’s” in their diction, there’s no telling why they may be calling some folks “puckheads.”

Those people could be Sharks fans. More than likely, the objects of their ire are practitioners of what appears to be a suddenly accepted form of racist humor. Forget about demonizing the enemy. Make them infantile, stupid and ineffectual. Objects of laughter!

Ever since the Chinese spy plane episode, people have taken license to dust off the old Mickey Rooney-style (see “Breakfast at Tiffany’s”) “white-man play dumb Asian” routine.

It’s surfacing in the darnedest places. Take for example the recent convention of the American Society of Newspaper Editors in Washington, D.C. At its opening reception, the sometimes-funny Capitol Steps comedy troupe performed a skit for the editors’ pleasure on the subject of U.S./China diplomacy.

The featured player was a white male in black wig and thick glasses, a “Chinese official” speaking through an interpreter: The running punchline: “Ching-ching chong-chong.”

What’s next? Condoleeza Rice as a pick-a-ninny drafting an apology in Chinese? How about a blackface routine on the curfew in Cincinnati?

When I first heard of the incident I couldn’t believe it. ASNE? The editors? They need this kind of grief? These are, after all, the folks who had established the year 2000 as the date for all of America’s newsrooms to reflect our country’s great diversity. When 2000 came, the newsrooms of America were still 89 percent white.

But that’s not all. The 2001 meeting started off with even more bad news. For the first time in the 23 years ASNE has bothered counting, the total number of minority journalists decreased from the year before. The precious 6,665 in 2000 became 6,563 in the year 2001. And most of them were probably working nights and weekends. Which is why the other 102 left the business.

The whole idea of minority retention is such a big issue in journalism that “ching-ching chong chong” just doesn’t cut it anymore. It’s not even in the AP style book.

But can we really expect any different from a group that claims a membership of 900 people, only 49 of whom (5.76 percent) are minorities

Oh, to be in that room with a big cigar and a fedora with press card in the hatband, laughing at “Ching ching chong chong.” Diversity be damned, nothing like some good old-fashioned racist entertainment for the enjoyment of our news and information gatekeepers.

Fortunately one person in the room was Amy Leang, a young Asian American reporter from Ball State University, who wrote about it for the ASNE convention Web site. Had she been older and employed by one of the editors in the bunch, she may have thought twice. But as an idealistic student intern, she was encouraged to write about what she saw. Leang said she was so humiliated by the whole ordeal the next morning she woke up crying. Probably from the site of seeing her future bosses and the industry they represent.

ASNE President Tim McGuire, editor of the Minneapolis Star-Tribune was asked by the Washington Post if he was among the laughing.

“I would have to say I was,” McGuire said.

Of course, he was laughing. He probably thought: “Asians? We can get away with this kind of treatment.”

But Dwight Ellis, a human resources official at the National Association of Broadcasters, and an old friend of mine, reportedly told the Post: “That this could occur at an ASNE convention is almost unbelievable.”

You wouldn’t see any taco-bender or spear-chucker jokes here. Why “ching ching chong chong?”

McGuire refused to apologize for the skit, telling reporters: “Very few people reacted the way [Leang] did…I don’t think we can make an apology because we didn’t control anything.”

Just like they don’t control the news. They just report it.

Some of you may be saying, “Emil, lay off the satirists, and give the editors a break. Didn’t you with your ‘puckhead’ remark commit the same crime as the ‘ching ching chong chong-ers?’”

Well, yes. And no. You see, as an Asian American of Filipino descent, it really does make a difference when I say the “f” for a “p.” It’s self-deprecating. Even charming. Somewhat amok. And you like me for it. We’re laughing together. And I give you permission to be my friend. But when you “ching ching chong chong” it’s not about self-deprecation. It’s about your superiority. And my diminution. You win. I lose. Not funny. And Amy cries.

“They’re the enemy,” you say. “Can’t we make fun of the Chinese?”

Sure. But the Americans were pretty funny too. There they were off the coast of China in a big pig of a reconnaissance jet. Just an ordinary weekend spy excursion.

“OK, but how does all this square with your absolutist stance on the First Amendment?”

Well, I didn’t say you couldn’t “ching chong,” or even “yo-yo-yo-yo” if you want. Good sense and good taste should dictate against all that. But if you insist, go ahead. I’m not going to censure you. What you’ve done is open up the debate and assured an angry response from 11 million Asian Americans.

Just don’t be surprised if someone thinks you’re a puckhead..