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The Global Joe Public Speaks

Frankly, I had no desire to read 12,000 pages of Saddam Hussein’s fantasy on weapons of mass destruction this weekend.

Wouldn’t you rather read the U.S.Tax Code?

Didn’t think so.

Preferring neither myself, I picked a third alternative. I downloaded the Global Attitudes Project from the Pew Research Center for the People and the Press. A modest 80 pages. Some graphs. No pictures. Good light reading.

If it’s been some time since you called your relatives “back home” just to check in, you can thank Pew for doing it for you. It conducted 38,000 interviews worldwide, a mixture of phone and in-person contacts, in as many as 44 countries, in what’s believed to be the largest simultaneous effort to gauge world opinion ever.

Ever wondered what the world thinks, beyond a wild-haired guess? Between, in fact, a margin of error of two to four percent? You don’t have to call 6.2 billion people. Just 38,000 — at random. Do that and you just might begin to hear the voice of Joe Public — worldwide.

U.S. news coverage, however, focused mainly on the smallest part of the survey, which concerned Iraq, and where the question was asked if Saddam Hussein should be removed by force. But only six countries were asked the Saddam questions as a follow-up to a previous survey.

Of course, Americans said yes (62 percent).

But how’s this for a united front? Our old colonizers, the British, didn’t quite have the stiff upper lip (47 percent). France said mais non (33 percent). Germans were looking for schnitzel (26 percent). The Russians were practically peaceniks (12 percent). And the Turks were Islam’s homeboys (13 percent).

Are you getting the feeling that a multi-billion dollar war will be on our tab?

What I found more fascinating and definitely under-reported were the opinions of our community’s homelands — the other part of our hyphen — the Asian parts.

For example, Asians aren’t very happy campers. Pew surveyed the world to gauge personal satisfaction with one’s own life. The highest were Canada at 67 percent (possibly the maple syrup). And the U.S. at 64 percent (home of American Idol).

But the Asian numbers were abysmally low. Bangladesh (14 percent). India (17 percent). China (23 percent). They were slightly happier in the Philippines, but maybe that’s because it wasn’t rush hour (31 percent). Indonesia (32 percent). Japan (39 percent).

The happiest Asians? Vietnam (43 percent) and South Korea (53 percent). But here’s a twist. Those happy Koreans weren’t so happy outside of their personal lives, giving low scores when asked about their satisfaction with their nation (14 percent), and the world (19 percent).

The top personal concern? Money, of course, according to the survey. Indonesia, India, Bangladesh, the Philippines, China, Vietnam, South Korea, all gave money a strong majority.

Japan, however, did not. Just 18 percent mentioned money. Then again, the survey found a full 43 percent acknowledged no personal problems at all. Ah, perfection!

Sure. Polls are polls. You don’t have to tell the truth. Still, they’re better than sticking your finger in the wind.

Asia did turn optimistic when asked about the next five years. South Korea, China, the Philippines, Indonesia, Vietnam, Bangladesh and India all had majorities looking on the bright side.

Only the Japanese stayed gloomy.

At least they’re eating in Japan. Only 4 percent were unable to afford food, the lowest percentage among the Asian countries surveyed. The rankings might surprise you. After Japan came South Korea (18 percent), China (18 percent), Vietnam (31 percent), Bangladesh (33 percent), Indonesia (37 percent), India (44 percent), and the No. 1 country with the highest percentage unable to afford food — the Philippines (57 percent).

And me with all the old lumpia in my freezer. We’ll just have to recast that old cliché, about “all the starving people in India.”

Those Asian percentages are still lower than those for Africa: Angola (86 percent), Uganda (71 percent), Ghana (65 percent), South Africa (59 percent). But they do put world poverty into perspective.

By comparison, the U.S. had 15 percent who said they couldn’t afford food. A low number. But still too high for a place that pays farmers not to grow it.

Other poll highlights? Asians (80 percent majorities or higher) are concerned with crime more than anything else, followed by political corruption, AIDS and terrorism.

The greatest danger to the world? Vietnam said AIDS (80 percent). Nuclear weapons scared Bangladesh (42 percent), the Philippines (49 percent) and Japan (68 percent). China said pollution and the environment (70 percent), as did the Philippines (49 percent).

But here’s an interesting tidbit on freedom and democracy. While Americans gave a relatively low mark to the news media (65 percent said it was a good influence), Asians loved their media. High marks: Vietnam (98 percent), where they love newspapers; the Philippines (88 percent), where there’s lots to report; and China (89 percent) where it’s all run by the state.

Lastly, what do Asian countries think about the spread of U.S. ideas and customs? The most favorable country is naturally a former colony, the Philippines, where 58 percent said it was “good.” But overwhelming majorities against American culture and ideas existed in Vietnam, South Korea, India, Indonesia, Bangladesh and Pakistan. The latter three are of course Muslim-dominated nations.

It’s a slightly different story when it comes to pop culture, like American music and Hollywood film. While majorities still approve, especially in places like Japan and the Philippines, there are sizeable minorities in China, Vietnam, India (home of Bollywood) and Bangladesh that take an extreme view against American culture.

Of course, ask Americans what they think, and they like spreading their culture and ideas to all far-flung places. But ask about a two-way street, and Pew indicates a “sizeable minority of Americans say they dislike foreign cultural products.” Could that be mainly white Americans? Pew doesn’t say.

Are these future sources of conflict? The real seeds of terrorism? We shall see. Pew’s next survey will focus on aspects of globalization. That should be an even more pointed survey.

In the meantime, if you haven’t done so in a while, call your relatives back in the home country. It’s the holidays. It will provide your annual “there but for fortune” moment. You know you’d be there if it weren’t for a little dumb immigrant’s luck. Yours, your father’s, your grandfather’s. But go ahead, check in back home, see how they really feel. Pew probably missed them.

Reach Emil Guillermo at emil@amok.com.