Right, Left, or Across?
August 18, 2008
One of the most important duties of a host is to set the seating arrangements. Depending on what style you wish to follow, it can be a bit confusing as to whether a guest of honor will sit to the right, left or across from the host.
Historically in Chinese culture, the guest of honor will sit opposite the host, at the head of the room facing the door. The host will sit with his/her back to the door. Other guests are seated to the left and right of the guest of honor or chief guest in descending order of their rank or importance (in Chinese etiquette, the left side is the seat of honor). This means that the least important guests may end up seated by the host, but this method is by some standards most logical because it allows the host to have the best direct view of the guest of honor, with decreasing degrees of views among the other guests.
Another Chinese style of seating is for the host to be seated in the middle seat facing the door. The senior guest of honor will be seated directly to the left. Thereafter, other guests are seated in descending order of status to the left and right. The most senior member sits in the center seat directly across the guest of honor. This seating pattern is used primarily for rectangular tables, whether you’re hosting a banquet or meal in your residence and for business or purely social reasons.
In the Western culture, a guest of honor is seated to the right of the host, regardless of the table shape. Other guests are thereafter seated to the right or left of the host in descending order, with the chief guest seated to the right of the guest of honor, then to the left of the host and so forth. In this style, the right side is the seat of honor.
To avoid any confusion, it is best to have place cards at every place setting to ensure guests are seated properly. In the absence of place cards, as with all dining situations, a guest should always wait to be directed to a chair before taking a seat at the dining table.
When dining in couples, the Western style is to separate the two host spouses at opposite ends of the table, allowing each of them to meet and enjoy other company. Unless the couples are just dating or engaged, the two are separated at the table.
Among guests, a woman is typically seated to the right of her dinner partner (from the man’s perspective, his dinner partner is always seated to his right.)
Happy Practicing!
Next month: Table manners for hosts and guests.
Syndi Seid is a professional trainer, speaker, and founder Advanced Etiquette. See AdvancedEtiquette.com for more information.
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